He's Got Us

He's got the WHOLE word in his hands....and that definitely includes The Whole WHITE World. I've referenced several times how GOD has taken care of so many things for us during the last year. He always does, but sadly, I think when we are struggling the most, we are more aware of his hand in situations.

Several things, big and little, have really just blown my mind. Tonight, I'll share how great our God is. They are unrelated instances, but PROOF to me, over and over again, that God's got us.

One of the hardest parenting heartaches, has been watching KD try to interact with other children. For quite some time, he always kept to himself, and even though it would break our hearts to have a house full of kiddos over, and inevitably find him all alone playing..... we reminded ourselves that just because that would not make our extroverted selves happy, doesn't mean he's not happy. Different things will make him happy. In the middle of the summer, we started to see a change in him. He seemed to be longing for friendships, he just didn't know how to create them, or how to connect in appropriate ways. One night in October, my twin and a good friend were over, and we were chatting about this very thing. I told them how my heart physically ached...and how desperately I wanted to see him making friends.... not just friends of MY friends' kiddos, but his own relationships. I said to them, "I'd cut off my pinky to have him be invited to a birthday party". We talked for hours.. they left very late in the night....and I was getting organized for the next day before turning in. I opened his backpack and found A BIRTHDAY INVITATION from one of his classmates. After I explained to God, that I was kidding about the whole pinky thing.... I stood and cried.... tears of thanks....both to God.... and for that sweet little boy (and his mom)who have NO idea what that meant to me and to my sweetie. God's got us!

In April of 2012, I set out on a mission to lose weight. I was miserable in my own skin....and honestly at a place of desperation. I decided to go for a product line, that was a "direct sales" opportunity---IN SPITE of the fact that it was a direct sales opportunity. I WAS NOT going to do the business. I was simply going to lose 5-15 lbs in 8 days. I lost 8 lbs in the first 8 days, and before I knew it I was telling others. One thing led to the next, and we ended up smack dab in the middle of the most amazing business opportunity. I'd lay in bed and ask my husband....."When did I decide to do this?" and we'd laugh. It was such a blessing, and honestly seemed too good to be true. I know now... it wasn't me who decided to do it....it was God's provision for me. At that time, I didn't "need" it. I'm not saying money was growing on trees, but I was living my dream of being an at home mom, and we were comfortable. What I didn't know then, were the medical expenses and therapies that were waiting for us just one year later. If I hadn't started sharing these products when I did, the expenses that were involved with the diagnosis process (they asked us for $1000 on the spot to start the Autism testing.. Jason said to me, "Thank God for X"), and the monthly prescription costs (more on that later), I WOULD have been looking for a way to contribute to the family financially... to enable us to stay afloat and get him the help he desperately needed. The catch in that would have been... MOST jobs would have taken me away from him when he needed me most (and I needed him most).  As it was... GOD already had provisions in place. He had put me in a flexible and rewarding opportunity, and surrounded me with an amazing support system, long before I ever "needed" it. Through it all, and still today.... we are able to get him every therapy and prescription he needs! I've said it before, and will again. If God is for us---what can stand against? He's got us!


So while we are on the topic of health costs.... I'll take it a step deeper. We have medical insurance...but we have no prescription coverage. The prescriptions for just maintenance of Kenton's asthma were between $500-800 a month. Ouch! When we were in the throws of the Cystic Fibrosis scare, we were told that families can expect to see between $5000-10,000 in prescriptions A MONTH!!!! Most would have discounts or coverage from insurance.... it could have SUNK us! In December, after forking over another $600 in asthma meds, and being very emotionally on edge...I asked the gal at the pharmacy, what would happen to my son if we didn't have that $600. I was curious...and knowing many would not have that available, and the nature of the potentially life saving meds... I truly wondered what happened to those folks. Where would they send them? What cash price would they pay? What "help" is there for those people---because if CF came to be, we could have ended up one of those people. I got a very cold stare. (imagine this going a little like a scene from "John Q"--father driven psycho trying to get his son needed medical attention ;) So I restated.... explained to her what we were potentially facing, and thought I'd get some type of advice, sympathy.. a suggestion of a number to call. Something. Instead, the cold stare remained. I got in my car, and decided, I just needed to stop living in fear of what the financial repercussions could be with a diagnosis like that.... I needed to start investigating. Take matters in my own hand. I decided to start with our current insurance provider. The lady was so helpful. After she listened to a very rattled mother explain the situation, and essentially cry out for help... she explained to me that under the new Affordable Care Act---the only questions they can ask me... are my son's age, gender, and whether or not he is a tobacco user. She told me we could get him their "Cadillac policy" for around $200 a month.... and that we would pay 50% of everything until we hit $1150----and at that point everything would be covered at 100%. And oh, by the way, this policy will also allow him to get Speech, OT, and PT, therapies up to 90 times a year!!  I was fighting back squeals.... thinking about how much this could potentially save us (even though it's a stinger to pay for two primary policies)... we were picking up prescription coverage---and would no doubt hit that deductible within a few months. Here is where God gets REALLY good! I told her I needed to call my husband and weigh out our options and we'd be in touch. Her response... "Oh sweetie, don't take too long... today is the LAST day for open enrollment for 2014."  What? Really? The day I hit rock bottom fear mode and got irked by a cold pharmacist... just happened to be the last day to enroll?  I don't think so. Thank you GOD for stirring me that day!!! You've got us! 

**** Can I sidebar here? Most of you know where I fall on the political side of things... I've had my fair share of negative thoughts on the Affordable Care Act. Honestly, MOST of them remain.... BUT....there is one REALLY great part of it... the pre-existing conditions. The insurance lady told me that based off of his asthma diagnosis alone, that policy would have likely been $800 a month.... and if he would have gotten a CF diagnosis, they likely would have turned down the additional policy. I share this because I think it's good for us to see that it is helping some. Since we appear to be stuck with it, it's good to know, that some will benefit.... just making lemonade here--thought some of you who are frustrated might want a sip of it too! ;) Right now, it's helped us, and I am thankful for that. Now before anyone thinks I'm out of my RIGHT (ha ha) mind.... know this-- I've ALWAYS thought pre-existing conditions should be protected, and that there was definitely room for improvement in our medical world. Without getting political here, I believe there were other ways that this could have been accomplished... and probably in less than 20,000 pages. ;)****


I could go on with more GOD things. Direct answer to prayer and intervention in our lives... but I've got a snoozing son laying at my feet (wandered out of bed about 3 paragraphs back)..... and I need to carry this 58 pound 4 year old to his room, and do the funniest little shimmy move you have ever seen as I attempt to get him back on his top bunk. On second thought, Daddy may get woken up for that job. 

I'll leave you with one, FUNNY...but "OK, GOD... I hear you moment". During all of the waiting and wandering with Kenton's CF scare... it was very easy to get irritable. I don't know about you, but typically the ones you love most, catch the brunt of that. Jason and I did well, stayed on the same page, and gave each other passes (I needed a few more than him) for out of character snips and snaps. We knew what stress could do to a marriage and weren't going to be victims to that. I'll get to the story. We were out of trash bags. I called my husband (texted a reminder too) and asked him to stop on his way home and pick some up. He assured me he'd remember....and alas did not. I may have snapped a little, you know the whole, "Do you even listen to me?" "One thing I asked for?" bit--- (I'm telling on myself here in the hopes that I am not the only wife who has gone there?) He just kept quiet, and decided to retreat to the mailbox to give me some time to chill out, come to my senses...and apologize (I always do, btw ;)). When he brought the mail back in, we were shifting silently through it... and there, in the stack... I KID YOU NOT, was a little box from HEFTY... with...you guessed it.... a big ol' sample trash bag in it. We stood there stunned, and speechless really. Then got the giggles.... and once again said.... "Ok, God.... you've got this!"

Some would hear these stories and chalk them all up to coincidence.... to me... it takes MORE faith to believe these situations were coincidence than it does to believe that there is a master....that is so powerful and ABLE and that cares so deeply for his children.... that he orchestrates each and every detail in our lives....and hears our prayers...and protects us....and provides for us in the big things and the little things. He's got the whole WORLD in his hands... and that MOST DEFINITELY includes The Whole White World---it'll include your world too if you let him .